Tag Archives: woo woo

happy accidents

28 May


All of life seems a flow from one  happy accident to another – each with the underlying message – I am cared for and guided on my path.  The inner and outer seem to meet – my inner dialogue, dreams, longings, needs seem to be read and reflected into the outer world in such a way that defies explanation.

You have this experience too, right?

I have few such incidents that are bubbling to the surface today.

Years ago I found a 20$ bill on the ground in my wealthy, large lawned neighborhood where there was no one to return it to.    I said a little prayer over the money, that I could give it to someone who needed it more than I did at the time. In finding this money,  I had the realization of my material comfort.  I put the bill in my pocket.  Later the same day, I was approached by a woman in a parking lot trying to sell me a bag of pecans from a tree; she told me of her great needs.  I was able to reach into my pocket and hand her the twenty. I got to pass on a bill that was never mine – and play a bit in the universal flow.  At this same time, I often felt like a failure for just being home and raising my kids in a pretentious and competitive environment.  A tap on the shoulder from a higher lens was well-spent on me then – a clue to keep on going – not all was as it seemed.

Last fall, I was meeting my friend for breakfast on an easy sunday morning, when I was hit from behind, which crumpled the body of the car in a way that damaged nothing except the aesthetics.  The insurance paid me $1686 to get the body repaired.  The next week, my car needed $1700 dollars of engine repairs.  Money that would be hard to come by was now serendipitously HERE NOW in my account from the fender bender.

The past few days have been a flow from  one sync to the next.  Here’s just one:   My daughter, Chloe, and I headed out to spend time together with no destination in mind.  We chose at each intersection, right or left, and ended up at a casual spot for a little snack downtown.  As we pulled into the parking lot, we recognized our next door neighbors from Charlotte, NC, from 6 years ago, were walking into the very restaurant right at that moment.     Mr. Johnson had been like a grandfather to my daughters.  He snuck away from his table and joined us at ours, caught up with Chloe in his loving way, in the gloaming hour.   We returned from the restaurant to watch the film The Beginners, which we had never seen,  and found that the main character Oliver carried out the motif of driving first with his mother and later with a lover by pointing the ways to go at each intersection –  the film mirroring our freewheeling ways from earlier in the evening – driving without a destination in mind, ending up exactly where  we ought.

In many 3D ways, my life may seem a mess.  When I am open and clear, I see the pattern behind the mess.  I will be where I need to be; I will see what I need to see; I will do what seems like my doing – but it will be more than that.  And I will see the inner reflected in the outer.

The Sync Book is a fun romp through the experiences of many wise voices on this topic.

I find that I do not tire of these tales.  The melting between the inner and outer and the melding of the self with everyone else points to the mystery and the deeper layers that actually are present in every moment – if we are open to flow.

There are 5 videos in a row,here, all a few minutes long.


woo woo, part two

21 Mar

Woo Woo is one of the topics that crosses the imaginary lines of our comfort zones.

In the continuum from strict, critical analysis <———–> to wide-open whacko, I haven’t signed up for a ride on a spaceship sight unseen, yet 🙂 but  I am mostly always fascinated by that which I cannot explain.   I am exhilarated by my peeks behind the curtain – which have occurred in many ways throughout my years.

One such exploration was down the trail of photographing orbs, spirits, lights…some thing at night.

After stepping into the void of separation from my marriage of 20 years, I spent a good part of that summer and fall wandering around my marshy neighborhood in the inky black evenings with my camera – crazy lady with a camera,  🙂 that was me.

One lovely photographer that I have come across focuses her blog on the phenomenon that I was hunting at that time.  I love checking out this site, when I can:  http://orbsdelight.wordpress.com

I had learned about the presence of orbs and such from my friend and saw that much could be seen through the inferred cameras with flash at night.  It is ironic for me to be taking pictures as I am well-known in my family and friends to be impaired with a camera.    i like capturing through my eyes, but the extension of extra equipment has always challenged me.  I tell tourists who thrust their cameras at me that they would be better off asking elsewhere as I am hopeless, cutting off heads and small children as I squint.  For me to capture anything unusual on the screen seems a mini-miracle in itself.

But this particular summer I didn’t care about my lack of skill.  My subjects didn’t seem to care either.   I was capturing the world unseen for my own enjoyment.  Things often appeared that I could not explain.

Two nights at the end of June 2011, this large manifesting light appeared in the same spot, two nights in a row.  Never before or since have I captured anything this dramatic.  This is the marsh behind my neighborhood.


Same shot: cropped close.


This is night two, in a bit of a fairy-like shape:


Same shot: close crop.SB2short-1

Here is an orb party I seem to have crashed:orbparty

This is a strange blue orb that I captured near my parents’ house in Northern Georgia:blueliteorb

Same shot: close crop.


And here is the phenomenon that I call spirit lights:


Be sure and click on these photos as they are hard to see unless a bit more blown up:


These shots are the highlights; to give perspective, dramatic appearances of large, vibrant, or unusual phenomenon were rare, but orbs and lights were present every night.

I haven’t any insight on what exactly I’m capturing with the camera here, but I find the process powerful and validating for knowing that the world outside our eyes and range of awareness most definitely exists.

Too woo woo for you?

Here is a link to Woo Woo part One 🙂 if you are so inclined.

Following the Trail of Cognitive Dissonance

1 Mar

Forgive my anecdotes, please.  I teach composition.  I tell my student that telling stories helps others to connect to their writing, to feel what they are saying. But I always hesitate to tell a story because I bask in emptiness at times; I love stepping away from stories of me, and wonder if fishing out memories is only adding to the “Story of Self.”

Stories to tell/no stories to tell, a polarity and a paradox.

These paradoxes present themselves all day long if we are awake and seeing.  The world is full of nothing but paradox.  An empty vessel is a worthless person/an empty vessel is enlightened.  I know I know nothing.  We learn from history that we do not learn from History. 🙂  These paradoxes are the whispers of spirit, the pull to zoom out beyond the duality.  The field that Rumi talks about calls to us.

“Out beyond ideas of right doing and wrong doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.”

― Rumi

The first call to look beyond is the discomfort we feel with Cognitive Dissonance, holding two contrary ideas at once that contradict.  This feeling of discomfort can at first make you want to take a comfort pill and go back to bed.  But if we are brave, Cognitive Dissonance invites growth beyond duality.

So here is a story of a bit of cognitive dissonance in my path a while ago.

I didn’t have access to computers or the internet right off because I was busy with my kids.  There was a marked time when all of the sudden, I was exposed to the myriad of information out there.

So right as this transition was occurring, I hastily printed out some information for my daughter whose teacher had requested she come in with some information about the Mayans.

She goes off to school and the page stayed opened on the computer and we all know how one peek leads to another to another, and suddenly I am down one of  my first rabbit holes.

I stumbled upon an Ian Lungold lecture about the Mayan Calander, 4 hours long.  I fell in.  It was rather academic for 3 hours plus, discussing the Mayan concept of time in contrast to the Gregorian Calendar and the Western measure of time.  I sat bolt upright when he suddenly began talking about aliens.   Aliens?  I sat her for 3 hours to listen to someone who was leading up to Aliens?   I was so disgusted with myself because this topic suddenly seemed so bizarre, outrageous, and unverifiable that I felt low and cheap for having wasted my time.  I had cognitive dissonance, and tried to shut it down by disregarding the entirety of the information.

But I could not dismiss how intelligent and lucid the 3 hours had been up until that point.  I couldn’t flush it all away.

Needless to say, I then spent years falling down many rabbit holes, learning to read, watch, and observe with a certain distance and an openness all at the same time – continuing with what seemed to interest and respectfully leaving what seemed out of line.

One of the voices that spoke to the process of this unfolding through so many avenues was Neil Kramer.

Here is an amazing presentation that offers up some of his teachings with visual and graphic representations so rich and illuminating, the  40 minutes gives one much in the exchange.

The Nice Kind of Time Travel

19 Feb


Two kinds of time travel that I know of:   the nice kind and the not so nice kind.

My friend introduced me to the nice kind of time travel a couple of years ago.  Here is a link to her blog post about just a smidgen of the possibilities of experiencing ourselves and others in this nonlinear way:  http://seeingm.wordpress.com/2013/01/28/the-power-of-phoning-home/

Up until her pointing for me, the possibility for this sort of travel had never occurred in my awareness.  I also realized then that I had been a participant in the Not Nice Kind of Time Travel for a good deal of my life up to that point.

The not so nice kind involves imagining yourself as someone “better” in the future.   You visit upon that future self with the chores, jobs, obligations that you, yourself in the now, do not wish to do because you see that future self as someone who is together, with loads of time, and strong organization skills to pull it all together better than you.  This sort of time travel can occur when you procrastinate now –  forcing your later self to stress just in time for a deadline.  This kind of time travel can also occur at a sign up list with dates into the future.  You sign your future self up for an obligatory task for helping out in a way you, in the now, do not want to do.  Oh, you say to yourself, that later self will have plenty of time to be in charge of the class party, volunteer committee, bake a cake responsibility.  I’ll let myself in the now off the hook because that future self will have it all going on, by then, surely!

That future day used to come and then I found myself looking back at that time-traveling marga and shaking my fist at her.  You, I told her,  sign up for your own now, for what you are willing to do;  don’t sign up your future self in this way.  This is being your own worst enemy.

The nice kind of time travel my friend introduced me to is actually much more earth shaking than what I just described.  This type of trip  is a powerful tool and paradigm shifting way of viewing your life and your reach, stretching the hand of love across space and time to the worthy recipient of yourself.

Let me see if I can explain.  This travel is a back visit to your earlier self in  painful, scary, pivotal times when you truly wondered if you would survive.  And since you know that you do survive into this future self in the now, you can go back and visit yourself, bringing the love, support and knowledge you wished for in the painful moment, with the full assurity this future self can only give.

When I first experimented with this, I thought of just the times to visit, immediately, and even remembered feeling the inexplicable wash of love that had come over me sometimes in my past.

We often think of guides and spirits being with us, but how interesting it can be to realize we just may be visiting our own selves, as well.

And really, if you dwell creatively here for a moment, the realization hits, that this is just the very beginning of all sorts of traveling possibilities.

See you around the next curve:)

Dark Matters

5 Jan

There was a guy who used to be at the library down the street.  He drove an old car with an enormous antenna off the end and a sticker that said something about info wars and a website to check out.  He looked a little bit like this:

crazymanThis was a small, local library, so the children’s story time was surprisingly close to where this man was conducting his research, daily.  What I’m trying to say is that I noticed him.

I was curious about just what he was up to when a librarian whispered to me one day that he was a “Crazy Conspiracy Guy”.  We all know this stereotype.

So when I found myself exploring DARK MATTERS a few years later, this man was in my head, and I wondered if I had fallen off the deep end.  What is a sweet (haha), stay-at-home mom doing exploring all sorts of dark, confusing information by internet, book, film, and lecture while her kids were away at school?  I didn’t know why I found myself drawn in this direction either.  Before, I couldn’t get enough information and teaching about meditation, non-duality, Buddhism, Taoism, Love and Light.  What is the pull toward darkness?

So hard to sum up years of experiences quickly and walk back through a trail that seemed to make no sense, but now seems perfectly ordained and meaningful in hindsight.

Super speedy telling, I had an NDE during the birth of my youngest, and upon coming back, I could see that things were off.  We all have a sense that something is rotten in denmark, something is off, but most of us, collectively, are able to sweep that “knowing” under the rug and get back to Consensus, conditioned REALITY.  My dark night of the soul made me so uncomfortable that I couldn’t just tolerate what was off any longer and the uncovering began.  To me, at the time, this exploration seemed the antithesis of my spiritual exploration.

One teacher in particular, that I came across, magically put all of it together for me.  In his “Gates of Awakening” teaching, I see a consolidation of the avenues I have found myself exploring through the years.  My Neil Kramer awareness came to me through some podcasts I stumbled upon.  Never did I listen without experiencing a deep pang of truth from within.  The teaching from this ARC Conference in particular spells out this exploration of Dark Matters as a necessary step upon the path of our Unfolding.

I think this is a 5 part lecture, but here is the next part.

So maybe you are wondering if I’ve turned into this:


Not yet.  But I am a little weird.  Here’s a picture from Improv Graduation 🙂  I’m in the green pants.


Dark, love, and light to you in your own exploring and improvising today!

12-12-12: Time to Get All Woo Woo

12 Dec


Woo woo:  adj. concerned with emotions, mysticism, or spiritualism; other than rational or scientific; mysterious; new agey. Also n., a person who has mystical or new age beliefs.

I spent years dwelling in duplicity; I was attracted to tangible manifestations of the world unseen while I presented an outward persona of scientific rational scoff at anything skirting on the edges of verifiability.

The shedding of identity is so lovely in that nothing is sticky.  When beliefs are not required, openness allows the mystery to enter and gently unfold itself to one’s observing eye.  And still nothing sticks. No explanation needed.  No need for the adoption of a new woo woo identity or cloak of new age mumbo jumbo.  The seen and the unseen exist together; we can tangibly observe this with open eyes…and flash photography 🙂

My daughters have had some challenging years of late: divorce, discomfort, boat life,  stigma,  bi-polar papa, to name a few off the top of my head…A little behind the scenes aid might have been in order.

I took several photos of Eden on her birthday last fall on a late night walk around the marshy areas near our home…and her unseen protective (perhaps) forces were all about.


This shot is taken in the pitch dark.  The shape of this flying light beside her seems like a butterfly, but the thick body seems to defy careful definition.  Then this same shape appeared in a tree a few weeks later.  Flying bats and insect appear in my photos all the time, but they do not light up like this, they reflect the flash back dully…this entity appears lit from within.


I have named this light Eden’s farie.  Eden is loath to have a woo woo mama, but will ask to see this picture every once in a while, perhaps to validate to herself the forces that are around us everyday, watching, strengthening, guarding…who knows?

Just to add a bit of rationality…when I think of the full range of the light spectrum that we have discovered compared to the limited range that humans are able to perceive unaided, the existence of  “things’ outside our awareness no longer seems woo woo, but inevitable.  Just to over-think it 🙂

Woo woo, yes, but also simple exploration lovingly held in the open hands of wonder.

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