I have been refurbishing a boat, getting her purty to party as an Airbnb. While working on the water, transforming the space with paint, fabric, linens, and elbow grease, I have also been sprucing up some often-tread pathways in my life. I may do some of the same things I have done in the past, such as owning a boat, yet I am going over this same old territory in a new way, as a transformed creature. I think SeeingM might say that I am rewriting the old script, more to my liking.
There once was a story in which a boat became the crime scene of my life’s destruction. Now the same rectangle space where salty sea meets river has water with a higher oxygen content and a funkier dance to its waves. I have had support from my friends in the flesh and from those magical moments that seem to unfold from behind the veil, as well.
We took a break from the laboring and went to visit this ancient tree spirit whose roots I imagine flowing deep underground, holding this whole area together to keep it from flying off. My muscles were a bit sore, my dear friend’s knee was swollen, I felt I could sleep for days, but off we went to commune with this tree. There is a solid, still and tangible presence to be felt for miles around this tree.
Trying to find estimations of this grandmother tree’s age led me to this photography session from a few years ago and to an interview with the photographer. The naked bodies are such soft animals next to grey and craggily bark. Nakedness going on in public at the Angel Oak, here in the deep south; oh my!
This oak has stood and grown and endured many, many phases of the moon and of man. On her ground, I feel the flow of life in all her interconnected forms.
Finishing up on the boat, David Gray comes on singing about his newfound TREEness of being, on the speakers I am reinstalling. On a floating platform. my feet are rooted for balance while my arms are overhead with a drill. A new script for winter and spring – the seasons bending my limbs around new corners.
Every day when I open my eyes now
It feels like a Saturday
Taking down from the shelf
All the parts of myself
That I packed away
If it’s love put the joy in my heart
Is it God by another name
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
I’m back in the world again
Like the lift of a curse
Got a whole different person
Inside my head
No more trudging around
Stony eyed through the town
Like the living dead no
It’s love that lifts us from the dark
Is it God by another name
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
It’s the only way to be
It’s the only way to be
I’m naked like a tree
It’s the only way to be
I’m naked like a tree
It’s the only way to be
Less than sand on the beach
Staring into the reaches of space and time
I’m singing out words
But the voice that I hear
It seems barely mine
If it’s love put the song in my heart
Is it God by another name
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
I’m back in the world again
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
I’m back in the world again
It’s the only way to be
I’m naked like a tree
It’s the only way to be, the only way to be, the only to be, the only way to be, the only
Read more: David Gray – Back In The World Lyrics | MetroLyrics
This is me, right now. I am a baby and I am just now gazing up the staircase to the mystery. I am a simple pip-squeak, but being a baby at the bottom of the staircase is a very good set of circumstances. There is great unknowing here. There are abounding possibilities from this spot. There is humility in knowing this, that I am a baby. I am not tempted to claim knowledge or write a book on all I know when I stand here in my diapers. There is a focus that comes at the bottom of the stairs. No longer does the veneer of conversation from the living room tempt me. The smells wafting from the kitchen don’t pull me in for a feast of tastes. The raging party in the basement? Nope. I’ve got a tall set of stairs to explore! And that is not all. There is another floor and set of stairs beyond this one. The floors go on forever – into infinity, for all I can tell. The speck of dust perspective is encased with a thick layer of love holding me tightly yet also compelling me up and out. Beyond this house, there are neighborhoods, cities, lands, oceans, a planet, then many worlds and realms in every direction, seen and unseen. When I catch glimpses of this, and the awareness of all the vastness that this little being can scarcely begin to explore, I can get a bit intimidated, yet this knowing coaxes me out of my shell and comforts, encourages me to clear the decks for exploration into what is to be found on the staircase up, sensed but invisible to baby eyes. Anybody out there want to crawl with me – up the stairs and out the skylight to the night sky to the stars to discover that not only are we babies, but we are also more than we could have ever imagined? Let’s go look around the bend, with the eyes that never blink. 
Life as Improv 