tap dancing on glass

2 Apr

astaire

It do turn on a dime. One minute you are getting in the bed, then you are called out of bed, a bottle from recycling breaks, things happen, and before you know it, you are trying to get the bleeding to stop and figure out how to get stitches at 11:30pm on easter sunday…you find yourself sitting with your ex in a hospital waiting room, making small talk in the middle of the night, singing praises every moment  that you are no longer tied to his upturned wagon, though grateful, too, he is the sort who will take you to the emergency room!   Sitting in the room, being sutchered, you memorize the wallpaper, the curtain with its sage green grass pattern and the dry erase board with the nurses name, kirsten, the orderlies name, storm and the  doctor’s name, Blue. And you think, while the numbing shots hurt like bloody hell (are you suddenly british?) You are truly here in this moment, because it is exactly the kind of time like all time to be present, when you can feel the pull to check out because it hurts, because it is scary, because it is proof you are not steering the ship; instead you find yourself merging with all the details here in this room, shivering from trauma and cold – You are here – and this moment is just as alive as  all moments, and you are as alive as you have ever been – bloody and beautiful. You are  laughing – life is funny. You see what is here; clicking salon-perfected fingernails at the sign in desk,  talk of full moons with the wheel chair guy,  storm has a tattoo with the date 1942. and  you ARE.

11 Responses to “tap dancing on glass”

  1. Zen Doe April 2, 2013 at 12:43 pm #

    Brilliantly written! And what a perfect message. Thanks so much for putting this experience into these words. And… I hope you’re ok!?!

    • marga t. April 2, 2013 at 8:55 pm #

      Thank you! Awkward wee wound is healing quickly!

  2. seeingm April 2, 2013 at 4:31 pm #

    Oh, the deep realness of hyper clear moments and (for me usually) floating like a cherry on top, the deep absurdity of it all. Surreal are the moments when we put the call out in the hint of a crisis and see who has the capacity to at least show up at all.

    You have shared your precious and sacred essence with the energy of recycling on this planet (also figuratively!) and in return, it helped define the position of the past players in your present. They can strut and fret their hours, but how wonderful to find a different a impact now due the courage of YOUR choices and holding true to your inner work. Massive kudos at finding the powerful beauty of sitting in gratitude. It is an amazing marker of great being.

    Healing, happy hello kitty looking band-aids with comforting rental car care taking hugs left for you right here Divine Ms M: xXx -xoM

    • marga t. April 2, 2013 at 9:11 pm #

      Ms.M-Bowing to you for your ever poetic and connecting metaphors from the ineffable realms to this denser plane – recycling gift exchange repurposing with a pause for a real glimpse of the past years’ journey to here – all woven together and illustrative of where I do find myself – completed with a Salvador Dali Cherry 🙂 Suddenly my clumsiness seems divine! Car rented with usefulness in mind – hugs relished, as well as tea time. Feeling peace radiating from your corner! XX!mm

  3. Awake in 365 Days April 2, 2013 at 11:01 pm #

    Boom! Here. And the veils fall down and its all raw and bleeding and beautiful. Thanks for bringing us into the ER with you to visit the past, and to introduce us to the wonderful characters who held and stitched your hand, I’m assuming it was your hand…anyway, I hope you are doing well, healing quickly. Best….Erin

    • marga t. April 3, 2013 at 12:50 am #

      Hey there, Erin! Thank you for coming with me into the E.R. 🙂 Twas my foot, unfortunately, because now I am having to delay our beach stroll! But healing fast! good awakening vibes sent your way, tonight. x!m

  4. tocksin April 9, 2013 at 1:12 pm #

    We are you friend i come looking to read your thoughts.

    • marga t. April 9, 2013 at 8:14 pm #

      I don’t know where I was but your voice reached me there and got me up and to it! Humble thank you – brilliant back door writer man!

  5. lovinchelle April 24, 2013 at 5:40 pm #

    Great writing

    • marga t. April 24, 2013 at 6:09 pm #

      Thank you for reading. Enjoyed discovering your corner this day 🙂

      • lovinchelle April 24, 2013 at 6:21 pm #

        Well I hope you will follow along with me

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