words out of my mouth

29 Mar

“Speak only if it improves upon the silence.” – Mahatma Gandhi

I cannot improve the silence, Gandhi.

I have spent some time silent.  I have spent time speaking.  I have spoken long spells as a fool.

Dare I contradict the man, Gandhi?  When I read his words, I feel humbled and silent.  That is good.

But I also know that silence sometimes is haughty – safe – stagnant.

Sometimes silence is like holding toxins in the body.   Sometimes words are the messengers of incorrect thoughts showing up like pimples needing to come to the surface to be seen, expunged, healed.

I  hear the narrator from “The Love-Song of J. Alfred Prufrock”  (by T.S. Eliot)  in my head:

That is not what I meant at all. 
  That is not it, at all…”  

When I brag like a peacock.  When I make a joke that hurts someone.  When I start expounding about something I know nothing about as if I know.  When I take over and cut others out.

proud peacock

“Do I dare 
Disturb the universe? 
In a minute there is time 
For decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse.”

I do disturb the universe because this is part of the path I’ve chosen – To use my life, words, mistakes as a mirror.  I love the peacock in his display; it is beautiful and daring.

It is easy to hate the pimple, turn away from the ugly but my weakness is loved; it is okay to say the wrong thing.

And by allowing myself to participate in this life, I learn.

And more and more words  become less like pimples and more like flowers from some magical garden of the ineffable.  I become a clearer vessel for the words that are not my own.  The flowers that appear from words can only blossom because I dared to allow myself space and love to reveal the words that needed to be released.

13 Responses to “words out of my mouth”

  1. wisejourney March 29, 2013 at 12:17 pm #

    And by allowing myself to participate in this life, I learn.

    This s a wonderful line.

    • marga t. March 29, 2013 at 1:34 pm #

      Thank you, wj. Sometimes takes me a whole lot of words to get to the crux 🙂

      • wisejourney March 29, 2013 at 2:04 pm #

        And you did….excellent

  2. Shackled and Crowned March 29, 2013 at 12:48 pm #

    🙂 thank you, retro, for sharing this. I think a weekly remind is needed for ME.

    • Shackled and Crowned March 29, 2013 at 12:49 pm #

      Grrrr. Not retro. I’m so sorry, Marga. 😦

      • marga t. March 29, 2013 at 1:37 pm #

        no sorry – so perfect – actually. Your “mistake” is actually right on, I am retro today…I posted Pink Floyd! Thank you for playing with me in this word soup!

      • Shackled and Crowned March 29, 2013 at 3:09 pm #

        🙂

  3. Alison March 29, 2013 at 2:30 pm #

    putting all the mind’s “idiocy” on external speaker is one of the best ways of seeing it clearly as idiocy. Been doing it for years. Fortunately Don is a good listener. It gets stuff all cleared out. With the intention to write the word Don it was actually the word God that came to mind. God’s a good listener too:)

    • marga t. March 29, 2013 at 4:47 pm #

      My mother used to let things just hang in the air, and one time I remember as a teen saying, “I just said something stupid, and you didn’t correct me,” and she said, “sometimes you just got to hear it outside of your own mind to realize you don’t really think that.” Having a Don or a God:) who understands that process is such a gift! You warm my heart!

  4. Alison March 29, 2013 at 6:45 pm #

    And you mine ❤
    Yes, Don and God both huge gifts. Very blessed.
    Your mother sounds very wise.
    xoxox

  5. vision5d2012 March 30, 2013 at 10:36 pm #

    To Speak or not to Speak — to know when to use words or remain silent = discernment. I have been sorely lacking in that skill, i’m afraid. Still, to remain silent as a means of never offending leads to stagnation, as you say. Thanks for this wonderful reminder for me who often just lets the words come out without thinking of whether or not “silence will be improved.” I have heard that as we humans become more telepathic, much of this will become self-correcting. ☺ Blessings and Love, Alia

    • marga t. March 31, 2013 at 12:48 am #

      Telepathy will clear things up tremendously ! I am imagining a party in the future full of smiles, music, and internal conversing 🙂 I’ll meet you there. x!marga

      • vision5d2012 April 2, 2013 at 4:31 pm #

        Wonderful vision Marga!!! I’ll be sure to make that one. May have to use that idea in Aurora — maybe I already have. Blessings, Alia

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: